all you can do is keep breathing….

i’m trying.
i’m trying so very hard.
i’m trying to start anew
i’m trying not to be sad
and
broken
and
difficult

i want so much to be someone else
everyone thinks i am doing so well
i can act the part
i put on a great show
but
i’m still sitting here unable to stop crying at 4 in the morning.

i feel empty

i’m trying to build something new
but
i don’t think i have enough pieces.

every single thing i can’t live without
goes

i want my baby
and
my niece
and
the person i was before i was irrevocably damaged.

i want to be happy
to be someone that a person could love without being hurt.

i wish i wasn’t this dark hole
but
i can’t shine a light bright enough.

i’m trying so hard
but
it’s never enough.

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2 Responses to “all you can do is keep breathing….”

  1. This made me cry….I could have practically written this myself….its hard when people think you are ok, when actually you are not! (((hugs))) Keep blogging and trying to admit your feelings etc somewhere at least

    • doyourememberthattime Says:

      i wish you didn’t know how this feels. i’m trying really hard to focus on the positive. i hope there are some good tiems for you too.xx

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